NEW YORK, NY — As the race for mayor of New York intensified, one prominent candidate landed the support of another popular Democrat, as a fake Indian made a public endorsement of a real Indian.

With all the controversy surrounding actress Sydney Sweeney's ad campaign for clothing retailer American Eagle, more people than ever are wondering what all the buzz is about.

METROPOLIS — Superman is a registered Republican, as confirmed by LuthorCorp CEO Lex Luthor at a press conference on Monday.

"A psychotic is an out-and-out loon. He may think his father is poisoning his yoghurt, that his wife is planning to strangle him with noodles, or that the US Government should flood Las Vegas with soda water.

    "A neurotic on the other hand is a determined sufferer, afflicted by things like depressed cuticles, a fear of pistachio nuts or underarm humidity. 

    "To put it most simply, a psychotic thinks two plus two equals seven ... A neurotic knows that two plus two equals four — but he just can't stand it."

~ Leo Rosten from his novel Dear Herm [hat tip Gordon McLauchlan's Acid Test]